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Not Poho. . .Pake!

If you ask my family, they will tell you that I am very pake in many ways. I hate paying full price for anything. When I shop, I go straight for the back of the store where the sales and clearance items are. The only thing better than not having to shop is getting something at 70% off. I love to go to Vegas, but I never gamble. Putting $100 into a penny poker machine is just poho (wasteful). I could have bought groceries with that money. I live right in town, but I carefully plot out my errands so that I don't go back and forth or cross my own driving path. That would be a waste of gas. At the supermarket, I write my list according to row so that I don't have to go back and forth in the aisles because my time is money. If I forget something, too bad, make do without.
However, there are certain things that I think are worth paying extra for: freezer strength Ziploc bags, Bocca meatless burgers, 0-point tortillas, Kleenex with lotion and double ply Charmin toilet paper.
In fact, there is one time of the year when my pake self is not ashamed to throw money away - New Years. I save Christmas money just to head over to Pinky's in Papaikou, Bro's and Pacific Fireworks, KTA and Longs to buy as many fireworks for as little money, and then watch my boys burn through them, make bombs, hold them in their hands for as long as possible and set off a string every half hour until my husband makes his grand finale, multiple string, multiple fountain concoction timed to the midnight countdown. Even if we no longer live next to psycho nurse who monitors our every fireworks indiscretion and shoots water at my kids, we are by habit legal practitioners, so we don't buy aerials (although we know where to get them), and we only pop within the legal hours of 9pm on New Year's eve to 1 am on New Year's Day. That basically means popping fireworks becomes a chore because I don't want to store them, so no matter how much we buy, we have to pop them within the 4 hours. So I have to sign out now. I've got some sparklers to light.

Comments

Maui Titah said…
Yes, the Pake blood is strong and there is a reason to shoot fireworks. My dad used to have my brother Joseph bring fireworks from Chinatown for the new years. Always the Duck Brand, of course. At least 10,000. We'd use the clothes line pole to string the fireworks on. Joseph was doing something illegal as he would transport the fireworks in his suitcase as he flew from Honolulu to Maui. We didn't have terrorism scares then although I am sure the combustible nature of the fireworks is as much as a fire threat then as it is now.
Joseph was my favorite brother...hanai-ed, carrying a different surname, never married, always sweet and gentle. He'd wear his white pants, white shoes, aloha shirt, and panama hat on his visits to Lahaina bringing delectable manapua, pepeiao, half moon, squid luau and other stuff we couldn't get in Lahaina.
Fireworks are a celebration but are also used to scare away evil spirits so...for another Pake who is even too tight to buy fireworks, thanks for shooting you off and we hope that your smoke will scare off the evil spirits from our place too...Kung Hee Fat Choy!
splendid said…
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